Faking My Own Suicide

Before any of you starts to make assumptions about what this post could POSSIBLY be about, I want to make things clear. This is the title of a song that has inspired me to write this. The concept that this song has to offer makes me think about many different things.

Now that is out of the way.


Have you ever thought about what would happen if you ever got seriously injured? Not the pain that YOU would feel, but who would actually visit you in the hospital and who would actually call to say that they hope you feel better?

I have been questioning the people in my life a lot lately, and I’m not sure who would do that for me. Selfish for me to say, but shouldn’t I want people that care about me as much as I care about them?

Or maybe they just don’t show it as much as I hope they would? Either way, I feel as though I am not mentally connecting with many people anymore, which makes me sort of upset. But hey, life happens and changes.

The song Faking My Own Suicide by Relient K is about a man who fakes his own suicide so that the person that he’s in love with will realize how much she actually loved him. This is what sort of made me begin thinking about the concept of caring and loving and why it is so odd that people want to act like they don’t care about things or people anymore.

It’s like it’s almost embarrassing to be transparent about how you feel towards others. It’s like people don’t have the heart and courage to show others that they truly do care because they honestly believe that their efforts will be in vain.

Effort is cool.

Caring is cool.

Loyalty is cool.

Showing all of the above is cool.

I suppose what I’m saying is this: Why do people feel the need to ONLY show they care during times of sadness and despair, when showing that you love and care for someone should be a very common occurrence? 

Why do we have to hide our feelings and smother it with attitude and disgust?

I have been trying my hardest to follow my own public promise of transparency. It is hard because many people are so closed off. I put my heart on my sleeve, and I will never stop doing that because I know that this vulnerability will one day help someone break down their own walls.

Tell someone you care about them today. Well, you don’t even have to tell them if you don’t want to; show them if you want.

That is all. Thank you so much for reading my blogs, guys. It means the absolute world to me.

– Megan

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